Saturday, April 9, 2011

Debbie Cox

Debbie Cox 04/06/1981-04/05/2011

I hate using my blog for eulogies, but this one is necessary and also the hardest for me. I had not met Deb yet. Although we had plans to sync up at a set break during a Phish show, this summer. Sharing in the anitcipation of that 'Second Set'. I am broken to tell you all that Deb's Second Set has ended. I am sure she is dancing away and using her energy celebrating the encore of her life.

Deb, an incredibly beautiful woman both inside and outside, passed away from Cystic Fibrosis and post 3 plus years from a double-lung transplant. She was a vibrant friendly soul. Just from a few emails and facebook messages we were like long lost brother and sister. That may sound foolish, but we shared many characteristics about our lives, interests, hopes, fears, and struggles. CF people have an unspoken bond. Only we know how we struggle, how we stay positive, how we go about life sucking every drop of meaning from the marrow of this existence. However our bond went a step further.

Both Deb and myself were Phish heads. Not just casual observers of the band, but truly into the music. The vibration of life that the band put forth each and every time they take the stage, we understood. We commented to eachother that the likliehood of finding another person with Cystic Fibrosis who had undergone a double-lung transplant, but also was hooked (so to say), by Phish is probably unlikely.

When I was going through my second transplant I would find emails from her with links to downloads of the Fall tour. We talked about how important the music was to us. How it represented freedom and made us happy. If only for a few hours.

Just a month ago we were talking about diabetic pumps. She was excited to get hers. She was posting messages on my wall encouraging me to look into them. We were also talking music and how Phish just announced their summer tour, figuring out which shows we were going to. She also had plans to go to the Furthur shows in Atlanta this weekend and some Panic shows. She was really excited to hook up with her friends and celebrate her 30th birthday with some legendary music! Our last correspondence was just a little over a week ago and I knew she was struggling but tried to remain positive. I want to share her message from a month ago.

'I'm excited to be on this side of the country, bc I can get in several shows if I go for it. I'm planning on going to Furthur at the Fox in Atlanta the weekend of my 30th birthday and I'm SO excited to see this line up. I hear they are amazing.' DC-March 2011.

On tuesday, while I was skiing in her homestate of Colorado, she passed away. I'm glad I was out in the mountains that day enjoying life and the beauty of nature. I don't understand anything except how to enjoy this life with family and friends. Something I know Deb did to her fullest.

'Set the Gearshift for the high gear of your Soul'



joan said...

Dear Mitch,

So sad to hear about a good friend
whose life had to end. My condolences.
Love, Joan.

Stacey said...

Ugh, it's always so sad to hear of the passing of another beautiful soul with CF. It is sad to see a life cut short and it also is a reminder that this disease is fierce. I'm sorry for your loss, Mitch...

Lynn said...

I feel the pain of your loss and am very sad. Love, Lynn

Anonymous said...

Oh Mitchie, I feel your pain and hate losing another person to CF. Please everyone continue to fight for life and continue to support the CF Foundation. It is the only option.

Scot said...

Mitch, you've written beautfully of your friendship with Deb. I'm glad you and Deb had such a wonderful bond, and extend my sympathies upon her passing. Scot

lulu said...

Its sad to hear that Deb has gone...she sounded like a great person :-( Lu

Danielle said...

we are leaving only love and prayers for your loss and Deb's family. It's tough for us to loose such a good cyster soul. Breathe Easy Debbie